I realize it’s damn near two weeks late, but the second installment of Radio Elite is now available for download right here.

Having said that,

• Why do people believe the strangest things? Michael Shermer has a few ideas.
• I need a late pass for this one: scientists (at Stemagen) have successfully created the first cloned human embryo from skin cells. “Humans should not be playing god,” you say? Why, dear thinking primates, god has been playing humans for so long! Let’s flip the script and fuck around a little bit … give the “almighty” a nice little existential crisis.
• Commodes are meant to be sat on in the right direction. If you sit at a 90-degree angle, you’ll be unpleasantly surprised by a doo-doo bridge between your sphincter and the porcelain, in an ungodly tug-o-war. Unnecessary information, I know. But I’m perfect, and you’re not. Deal with it.
• Pretty intense: the impossible art of Li Wei
• A friend just asked me:
  

  the only sound advice i need now is … navigating the fine line between muffling her screams of exctasy with a pillow … and accidentally discovering you’re into necrophilia. how do i get rid of the body dude?

• I’ve ranted about cheetos in the past. And today, someone sends me a link for Random Acts of Cheetos. Unbridled hilarity of epic proportions.

That’s it. If you need me, I’ll be in the Beyond section at Bed, Bath & Beyond, licking furniture and smelling colors to improve my synesthesia.

“Just do your thing, man. It’s all yours,” he bellowed, dramatically gesticulating towards one empty white wall of his new condo’s dining room. It wasn’t furnished, yet. In fact, the place looked like it needed a lot of work. The wall-to-wall carpeting spanned the living and dining rooms, decorated with insolent stains and holes. The bedroom and bathroom to the side seemed limp, like paralyzed limbs dangling from their sockets.

I am still uneasy in my pretense. I am supposed to be an artist. Or some sort of person versed in visual creativity. It seems my visual creativity for most of my life may have consisted mostly of imagining the circumference of a random woman’s areola. Of course, that has its merits, too. Just not for a friend’s dining room mural.

(more…)